By Susan Dunn, MA, cEQc, The EQ Coach™
I had to laugh when I read that quote recently. I particularly remember a time in my merry life when I had two sons, 3 dogs, my clothes filled two Life is a series of stages, and there is the “acquiring” stage.
However, there came a point where I felt It caused me to take a look at the whole picture. I was exhausted all the time. I went to a therapist; too bad there weren’t coaches then. She said I was “trying to do too much.” I Coaches make things more clear. “Why are you doing what doesn’t bring you pleasure?” would’ve been the question to ask. Eventually I asked myself that question and here are some of the things I did.
THE CLOTHES I did have to “dress” for my profession at the time (PR), so I chose two outfits I could accessorize in infinite ways. Scarves, jewelry and pins take far less storage space!
THE DOGS THE ENTERTAINING WARE THE COOKWARE Not everything in the enriched life should be “efficient.”
THE FINANCIAL PICTURE THE ORGANIZATION One thing I did was buy containers, for instance, “fall decorations” and got everything in one place. I added to the box my apparel for that time of year – autumn sweaters, accessories, and I tackled the gift-producing area. I had a bow maker, rolls of paper, ribbons, ready for every occasion. It was a time when the boys would be Also, seeing myself “burdened” by the gifts coming my way – that teddy bear statuette just wasn’t “me” even if it was expensive crystal – I switched I have never been comfortable giving money, but gift certificates seemed possible. It showed at least a little “thought” and “effort,” the two For those with no material needs whatsoever, I would donate money to a charity close to their heart. That is greatly appreciated by most people. Charities list in their newsletter the Re: the people in my life, I took a look at the investment-return ratio. Some of them, I had to admit, were a drain. With me being in a helping I made a list of the people who really meant something to me, with whom I had strong mutual bonds, and I whittled away at the ones who didn’t contribute anything to my life. We call this in I eliminated immediately the ones who were a negative drain on me, and took a closer look at ones wanting entry. I quietly discouraged some “friendships” from ever occurring in the first place. Life is choices.
I believe that our lives are greatly influenced by the 5 people we spend the most time with. I made sure the Top 5 were the ones I wanted and needed them to be.
META-THEORY I would not go shopping to “window shop.” There’s no such thing! There’s always something attracts my eye I think I “must have.”
Shopping would be a necessity for essentials, not Saturday afternoon entertainment for me and the kids.
I put more thought into the things I gave others so as to slow the flow into their lives as well.
READY FOR THE NEW YEAR Good reasons are: Bad reasons are: Oserve closely your own behavior. That’s the beginning of making positive changes.
It’s the emotionally intelligent thing to do!
ŠSusan Dunn, MA, cEQc, The EQ Coach™,
closets in my home, I owned Madeleine pans, exotic juicers, a regular and a gourmet coffeemaker, 3 sets of flatware, 10 tableclothes, 10 sets of
placemats for 6 or 8, and formal china
tablesettings for 12 … and most “cluttering” of all, a social calendar that was unmanageable.
overwhelmed by my “blessings” and took a look at what was going on. At the time, my boyfriend, who was a stock broker, kept saying, “Simplify,
simplify.” He lived what I considered a “Sparten existence.”
interpreted it that I wasn’t capable of handling all these things, and redoubled my efforts.
I was still operating from an old childhood scarcity-mentality. I never had “enough” clothes in high school, not because my parents couldn’t afford it, just that they didn’t want to spend
their money on that. I started babysitting rigorously to buy myself clothes and makeup and stuff. Not a bad thing to do, but I realized that
time was over. I gave a number of things to Goodwill, set aside a space-allotment, and stuck to it.
Two were strays we had “adopted,” under pressure from my good-hearted son. However, they were difficult dogs, not having been well-raised, and took far more work than our original family pet.
I decided to give up this rescuing mentality and at the same time educate my children. We found good homes for two of them, and the family pact
was “no more.” We stuck with our one chosen, well-cared for, and well-trained dog.
That’s a hard one. It’s been an abiding interest and love in my life, to entertain with all the accoutrements. I decided that was an okay hobby, but to stick with what I had for a long time. How many sets of Christmas tablemats does one really
need?
Life is choices. I could eliminate a lot of these things by turning to fast food, eating out, less elaborate meals. I decided this was not something
to sacrifice. There are health benefits to wok cooking, steamers, double boilers, etc., and "happy" benefits to beautiful Bundt cakes. My youngest son particularly enjoyed the camaraderie of a fondue meal. Our family dinners were fun for all of us, and a good thing, and I didn’t want to sacrifice that for “convenience.”
My stocks were scattered all over the place, and we consolidated. It seemed risky to me to “put all my eggs in one basket,” but we did, and it resulted in a nice financial gain.
I decided it wasn’t all that I had that was the problem – many of them were valuable to me and my lifestyle – it was the organization of it all.
jewelry. I labeled them clearly, stacked them in one place, and felt better about it all.
invited to a birthday party quite suddenly, and it kept me from “running out” at the last minute to buy the wrapping. This I decided to eliminate.
The storage space required and the clutter were not worth it, and it seemed I never had the right thing anyway. I bought 10 generic gift bags with white tissue, appropriate for any age or occasion.
to what I call “disposable” gifts. Sending someone a floral arrangement, or a basket of fruit, or a Honey-baked ham would note the occasion, but it would “go away” and they wouldn’t
have to find a place for it.
things I find missing in gifts of money. (Not that I’ve ever refused one!)
gifts made in honor of, or in memory of, others, and that’s a nice touch.
profession, some were “using” me for free counseling, while making no improvements in their lives, and that didn’t give me the friendship I needed, or provide for them the counseling or
coaching they needed.
coaching, “getting rid of tolerations.” Yes, people can be “tolerations” and I think this is one of the more important “ah hahs” Thomas Leonard, the founder of coaching, gave to the world.
I decided to slow myself down at the checkout counter. I disciplined myself for 6 months. I would not make any impulse buys. I would go home and consider it. Usually it wasn’t worth the effort to go back.
As you participate in, or observe, the shopping frenzy of the holiday season. Ask yourself, “Why am I doing this?”
ˇIt’s meaningful
ˇI enjoy it
ˇI know it’s something I can afford and know it’s something they need or would like
ˇI don’t know why
ˇTo keep up with the Joneses
ˇBecause I always have
ˇBecause you're supposed to
http://www.susandunn.cc . Author of “How to Live Your Life with Emotional Intelligence,” (
http://www.webstrategies.cc/ebooklibrary.html ) and The EQ Foundation CourseŠ, 12 modules on the Internet that can change your life:
http://www.webstrategies.cc/EQcourse.htm .
Coaching for all yours needs; Emotional
Intelligence always included.
Mailto:sdunn@susandunn.cc for FREE eZine.
By Anonymous
Long Island, NY September 7, 2004 -- Things are really heating up for the Long Island-based indie, pop-rock band Ultra High Frequency. Recently releasing the highly anticipated debut CD The Sun Never Sets In Dramaville (Mugshot Records LLC,. production by Jason Marcus), this young 4-piece band is receiving rave reviews of their CD in publications such as The Long Island Press, Riftrock and Silent Sky Media. Ultra High Frequency consists of front man/songwriter Frank Fussa (vocals, guitar), Jon Tehel, (guitar, vocals), Chris Johanidesz (bass, vocals), and DJ Jacobs (drums).
Now comes word that Ultra High Frequency has blasted its way on college radio stations and their respected charts. In only the first 3 weeks “Sun never sets in Dramaville” is currently being charted in the top 30, including such stations as NVWR, WSIA, WUTK, WPMD, WWSP, WGLS, CHYZ, WVVS, WLCA, KCSU, with KFKX and WCCM both charting the album in their top 10! To date, 70 stations have put the record out for play. Ultra High Frequency has already performed live on air on local radio station WLRI with many other live performances to happen.
To help celebrate their recent release, Ultra High Frequency will throw a CD release party and be appearing in concert at a MEANYFEST/KerriBlack show on Friday, September 17. The show will take place at Manhattan’s famed Tribeca Rock Club and the band will hit the stage at 10PM. Additionally, the band will perform at a battle of the bands NYU Benefit show for Cystic Fibrosis on Thursday, November 19, 2004. Ultra High Frequency will embark on a spring tour in support of The Sun Never Sets In Dramaville. Tour date information will soon follow.
To get on the guest list for any of the above mentioned shows, request copy for review of The Sun Never Sets In Dramaville, or arrange an interview with the band, please email booking@uhfmusic.com For more on Ultra High Frequency, go to www.uhfmusic.com .
This article courtesy of http://derek-butlerreviews.krapoo.info/.
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By Anonymous
Calabasas, California, USA: Harris Communications has recently tapped Microcom Technologies to distribute its line of test equipment and tools. This line includes some of the finest hand-held test sets (butt-sets), punchdown tools, and other voice and datacomm tools in the telecom industry.
Harris has led the way in butt-in test set technology for over two decades. In order to continue its success, Harris has recently expanded its industry-standard testing portfolio to include a variety of products engineered to meet the specific requirements of international customers. These products are designed to meet both international telecom standards and Harris’ demanding quality requirements.
The key to Harris' continued competitive advantage is clearly the quality of design and manufacturing. Many tools are multi-function products, meaning that the technician has less to carry. They also fit comfortably in the hands that use them repeatedly day after day.
In addition, the Harris Pro-Tool Kits and the Telecom Kits meet the needs of professional technicians who are expanding their telecommunications and data communications' networks. More information on Harris' line of test equipment and tools can be found on their website at the address http://www.commprod.harris.com/testsets-tools/.
Contact your Microcom sales representative at (818) 880-8008 for product and ordering information.
This article courtesy of http://derek-butlerreviews.krapoo.info/.
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your newsletter provided this courtesy notice and the author
name and URL remain intact.